A lot has happened over the past four years, to say the least! I will not get into the details, but life has been incredibly challenging. I cared for my mom through her illness, experienced deep grief after losing her, and made some significant life changes, including moving to the West Coast, starting a new job, and recently moving again into my new apartment. It has been a lot, to say the least.

For years, I barely survived, and grief consumed me. I did not feel motivated to focus on my health. Now, I am settling into my new life and I truly enjoy living on the West Coast. I am deeply grateful for everything I have, which I put tons of energy and time into creating. I will share more about that journey in another blog.

But even with all the gratitude in my heart, I can tell that my body is exhausted and still stuck in survival mode.

Recently, during a coaching session – because every coach should have a coach – with my dear friend and peer coach, Tiffany, I shared that my next goal is to take care of my health and body. Over these past three years, I gained weight and I did not have the emotional bandwidth to care about it. But now that I am in a better place, it bothers me. I want to feel good in my body again, not because I am chasing an image, but because I am in a different emotional place.

During my session with Tiffany, we created a plan. However, interestingly, this plan was not about doing more but about becoming more in alignment with myself. It was not about pushing myself harder but about returning to my heart, a place where I feel calm, rested, and whole again.

Knowing how the automatic nervous system works, it makes total sense. It has two divisions: the sympathetic—fight or flight, survival mode, and the parasympathetic—rest and digest, healing mode. If you have read my book Weight Loss Through the Soul, you know this topic is close to my heart.

When we are stuck in sympathetic survival mode, our body is ready to fight or flight, but digestion, repair, and healing come to a halt.  To reach my health goal, I want to create an environment for my body to get back to homeostasis. The plan I developed during my coaching session focused on finding balance rather than restricting my diet or over-exercising.

Here is what I focus on:

• Resting more— to relax my nervous system.
• Setting time aside to reflect and connect with myself – to be aware of my emotional and physical needs.
• Consuming nutritious meals that are easy to digest— to nourish my body.
• Committing to only what is necessary— to protect my time and energy.
• Keeping my focus on hope and gratitude— to uplift myself emotionally and change my mindset.
• Believing that I deserve good things in my life — to set the stage for positive change.

When I feel centered and balanced, I will add MORE to my routine: more exercise or a stricter eating plan.

When setting a goal, many try to achieve it by force, pushing harder and working more. We need discipline and focus to reach our goals. However, after everything I have learned and experienced, I understand that true healing and lasting transformation come from approaching ourselves with compassion and understanding. It is essential to use strategies based on wisdom rather than force. Not that force doesn’t work. It does, but it is short-lived and draining not rejuvenating. 

I am curious: when you think about getting healthier, do you push yourself harder or listen more deeply to what your body and heart need? What would you think if your coach, who helps you to lose weight or get healthier, asked you to slow down instead of doing more? I would love to hear your thoughts.